Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Alpha Male

We've all experienced them. Depending on your definition and view point they can be either confident or cocky, powerful or pushy, headstrong or forceful. They're the guys at the bar who push their way to the front of the line, who aggressively chase the prettiest girl in the room, or the guys who speak louder than anyone else so they can be heard. It can certainly be a compliment, but it's most usually that jerk who's trying to make a pissing contest out of everything. 

I typically try to stay out of the way of the "Alpha Male" game. My demeanor is much too shy. I'd rather sit on the side-lines and let my quiet confidence speak for itself. There are a handful of times when I will pull out my Alpha-Male card, however. If I feel something is worth fighting for I will fight like a wolf in a trap to get it. If I feel a social injustice is occurring, or someone is out of order I will speak or act out. Another case is when I encounter offensive idiots who I believe should be shut up, or at least confronted. This later instance occurred the other night, at a friends apartment after we dragged an obnoxious tag-a-long to an after party.

I was very bad, and decided to go out on a school night to meet up with some friends who I hadn't seen in awhile. A friend of a friend showed up, and was joining us for drinks. Seemed like a nice enough guy, until he tried to book it without helping pay for the numerous rounds of shots he had put on my friend's card: strike one. 

So we went back to my friends place when the bar closed to hang out. Mr. Friend of a Friend (we'll call him Joe) tagged along, clearly keeping a keen eye on one of the girls that was with us. While in the kitchen talking to my friend my one lesbian friend came in livid. She mentioned how Joe was making offensive and inappropriate comments on the gay community: strike two. 

So later in the night we were outside discussing things, when he casually dropped the N-bomb. Personally I'm very much against this word. I know there are people in the black community who justify the use of it as slang, but I'll still disagree with them. And I especially disagree with a white boy, who's hanging out with a bunch of other white boys using the word. So I nicely asked him to stop using hate words, and we got into a verbal discussion about the topic, and whether or not a hate word could become acceptable slang. I asked him if we started using 'Nazi' as cool slang whether that could ever be acceptable, which he disagreed with, but stuck to his guns on the N-word. For a buffoon it was actually a decent conversation.

So a few run-ins like this occurred through the night. Him making an ass out of himself, and me arguing with him. If you know me, you know it takes a lot for me to dislike someone. It takes more for me to speak badly of someone. And it takes a whole heck of a lot for me to verbally express that dislike to the person. Well, Joe was one of those few people. 

Later in the night, and much later than I should have been out on a Monday, Joe was about to leave. I said good-bye, and we shook hands. I think you can tell a lot about a person by the way they shake hands. Joe felt my firm grip, and felt he needed to squeeze even harder, obviously he had something to prove. As he was leaving he was talking to my friend who had offend, and started spitting self-deprecating trash talk about Italians, and how they were fat, hairy, etc, etc... Usually I can appreciate that type of humor, but the way he was doing it (along with his night history of offensiveness) I found it mean spirited: strike three. 

"I don't know, I've found most most Italians to be pretty nice people. About 98% of them actually. And I won't tell you which percentage you fall in." He didn't have much to say after that.


Stepiphany said...

Wish I had witnessed all of this!

.breakmedown. said...

oooohhh i would've been right there with you - ignorant people are intolerable